Monday, March 23, 2009

You Don't Need To Die In Jihad To Get 72 Virgins

You can buy them at the auction, one by one:

From JawaReport
Romanian Babe Auctions Virginity

(Caracal, Romania) An 18-year-old Romanian student, Alina Percea, has posted an ad on a German-language dating website to auction her virginity. Miss Percea says,

"I am a 108lbs, 5.67 ft tall, brown-eyed Romanian girl. I don't smoke and own a certificate from a gynaecologist which says I am a virgin. I want my first time to be special and not very abrupt."

Obviously, Miss Percea wants to deter any abrupters (abruptionists?) from bidding.

Miss Percea has expressed hopes of receiving 50,000 euros for her nontoxic asset with the added bonus of maybe finding a husband. Unfortunately, with three days remaining in the auction, the going bid for her precious flower is a mere 5,033 euros.

Miss Percea, small entrepreneur looking for foreign investors

Prospective bidders for Miss Percea should follow this link. She is identified as Jungfrau18. Miss Percea also adds:

P.S.: Ich möchte das Auktionsgeld gerne dafür nutzen, um auf die Hochschule zu gehen, aber wenn ich über die gesext-Auktion mein Glück und meine Zukunft fände, wäre das natürlich auch toll.

I think that means she is still in high school.

I am from Romania so I have some insight I wold like to share with my readers:
Domnisoara (Engl. for Miss) Alina recommends herself as being a resident of the town of Caracal, Romania. Caracal is famous nationwide due to a traffic accident happened there at the beginning of the last Century. As the story goes, a Romanian prince decided to get rid of the stupidest, most imbecile subjects of his. After a nationwide IQ test was given to all citizens over 18, the people who scored the worst were rounded up and put in a horse drawn carriage. The driver was then given the order to drive the carriage filled with fools across the border and dump them in the neighboring Bulgaria. Kind of like dumping your trash in your neighbor yard when he's not looking - if you know what I mean.
Long story short: a couple of days later the newspapers reported that somewhere very close to the Southern border in the town of Caracal the horses got spooked in stormy weather by thunders and the carriage filled with morons flipped in a ditch.
Nobody died in the accident; however none of the passengers made it back home because they were too stupid to do so. Instead, they settled down in Caracal where they married and procreated. So that's how the town of Caracal is still famous to this day as the town where the carriage filled with stupid people flipped in a ditch.
I am not surprised at all reading that miss Alina is from Caracal. She seems to be a worthy heir of her exiled ancestors.

8 comments:

Lucas said...

oh? You are european? So am I!

I knew that there was a conservative (christian?) in europe somewhere. I am not alone!

Transsylvania Phoenix said...

I am an American now. Or should I say European-American? ;)

Lucas said...

haha

This story of the "fools" of Caracal is funny!

Transsylvania Phoenix said...

It's a Romanian thing...if you meet somebody who is extremely dumb you don't tell your friends "this guy is stupid"; what you say is "he must be from Caracal" - and everybody gets it.

Lucas said...

IN some Lisbon circles (very small ones) we usually say that he/she is a "mafrense" (From Mafra).

Anonymous said...

There must be a Caracal in every country, camarade Transylvania. ;)

Anonymous said...

You just have to find it. :))

Anonymous said...

You just have to find it. :))